It’s three on a Monday, and I’m already getting nervous. I didn’t use to. I’d do panels and feel confident and share my ideas on almost anything to do with writing. I did an entire library series on writing with some of my friends that they aired on our local public TV. I felt pretty chipper back then. But I’ve gotten beat up over the length of my career, and I feel like I’ve learned a lot but who knows if any of it’s right? At four today, Leah Bailey, a perfectly kind person, I’m sure, is going to question me for her Cozy Ink Podcast Author Interview. After the interview, she’ll let me know when the podcast will air. But it’s the question and answer segment that makes me nervous.
People who know me, and love me anyway, know that I’m perfectly capable of foot in mouth disease. And I’ve gotten worse with age instead of better. A bummer. You’d think you’d learn from experience, but sometimes things fly out of my mouth and I wonder what in the world I was thinking. My filters have taken a beating. I’m not the bright-eyed, bushy-tailed person I used to be. And some of the things I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing with publishing have left me a little jaded. And disappointed. But I still love to write and share stories and characters. And I’ve worked with a lot of wonderful people. Kensington might have dropped me, but I’ll never regret working with my editor there, John Scognamiglio, and the team of publicists, media makers, and book lovers that I got to know. Publishers focus on the bottom dollar, but editors and publicists love books and authors. They do their best to support them.
I’ve been on more panels than I ever expected over time, and I feel like I have a lot to share, but honestly, there’s something about being asked a question with no warning that makes my mind go blank. And some of the questions are hard for me, because these days, I tend to overthink them. Like one I had at a conference–“What do you think is the hardest part of writing cozy mysteries?” My first reaction was, “I think it’s hard to write anything well.” But the person on the panel next to me–a cozy writer I admire, Mary Angela–had a brilliant answer. “Having an amateur sleuth be able to question enough people to solve a crime poses a special problem. No one HAS to talk to her.” Wow! Wonderful answer. Why didn’t I think of that? I would have when I was younger. These days. My brain hits pause and I ponder.
So, wish me luck at 4:00. And I’ll let you know when the podcast is available.
Since this blog was pre-scheduled, and it hadn’t gone up yet, I just wanted to let you know that the podcast will be available on April 27th, and Leah Bailey is SO easy to talk to, she was like chatting with a writer friend. She made it so nice! I survived and I’m really happy I met her.